For the First Time

    I am not sure.
   
    For the first time in a longish time I am uncertain and confused about what to do, which direction to turn.

    I kind of thought that something would work out, which now it appears it may not.
 
    I kind of thought school would go smoothly and I'd accomplish my career goals easily,. now it appears that may be harder than I imagined.

    My major is up in the air, my finances are stable currently but are also up in the air. My plans are far from definite. My options are thin in tech direction yet attainable, and numerous in USC direction but possibly financially out of my reach.

    But, one thing I have noticed.

    I never think anymore that I can't do something because of the time it would take. School for years no longer scares me. My age no longer scares me. The thought of not being ready for my next phase of life by the time my current awesome boss retires no longer scares me. I finally feel invincible in a way I never have. I may be single and stay single for the rest of my life, but the thought of being in school for years and years working for a difficult degree that I may not complete until I'm in my mid-forties doesn't seem like a waste of energy to me. Because after all, mid-forties?? I could have 40 more years after that, I could have 55 more years if I live as long as my Mother's side of the family does. Being a Psychologist at age 45?? What could beat that feeling....

    For the first time ever......I feel like I can do anything I want to do.